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If you will spend some time discovering what triggers you, you can make enormous progress in your life to become the kind of role model your kids deserve. You can share your new skills with your kids to teach them how to handle things when they become triggered.

In addition to being the piece that fires a gun, the word trigger is also defined as an act that sets in motion some course of events or a device that activates or releases or causes something to happen. When we are parents, there are frequently triggering moments. When we are divorced parents, those triggering moments seem to inflate themselves.

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Going through a divorce can really stir up emotions like margaritas in a blender. But if you’re going to be the best parent for your kids, you need to turn the blender off and learn how to keep your cool.

In the first few years of being divorced, we find that our emotions go through huge vacillations. One minute you’re a calm, kind loving parent - maybe a little overindulgent - and the next minute you have no patience or tolerance for the kids you truly love because now you’re irritated. It’s a huge flip flop, and it’s probably something you ought to consider getting under control, because while it might be normal, in the end it isn’t productive for either you or your children. You only get one chance to raise them right.

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